Sunday, 20 December 2015

Making and keeping friends, not always easy...

Hi Guys! I've just finished a really stressful week with loads of big assignments and tests and now I'm enjoying a short break before I'll have to start studying again for the exams in January. 

Making friends and keeping them is something I've struggled with my entire life. I don't have great social skills and I'm working on myself every single day. By now, I've already gone through a lot of pain but I've also gained a lot of widsom. I want to share with you my insights on the importance of friendship, but also what's actually not that important about it.

Keep giving

I cannot stress enough how important this is! Even when you're going through a tough period in your life, even when you feel like no one loves you, you need to keep giving. You need to keep loving the people you care about. The point is, you never know what your loved ones are going through, or where anyone is basically going through. Always try to spread kindness and try to not judge people and when you can't say or do anything nice, just don't say or do anything at all. Eventually, your loved ones will give back to you and everything will be okay, just don't wait for it. Happiness is not something people can give to you, you need to create it yourself. 

Friends come and go. Yes, even the true ones!

This one is still really hard for me to accept, but at the same time this gives me peace. You still remember that amazing friend you had in primary school that would always stick up for you? I know I do. The thing is, I don't have that friend anymore, even though it was a true friend. He was the friend that I needed at that time in my life. Now, I have new ones, some I've only met a couple of months ago, and I already love them! :) Always love and appreciate your friends, you never know when they might leave or when new friends might come along the way. 

Focus on the positive

When you're like me and you often feel lonely and feel like no one understands you, this is a really important tip. Because of feeling like an outsider so often, I started having depressive episodes. I would focus on every little aspect that was wrong with me and simply couldn't see the good in people anymore. Not that it was an easy task at that time, besides struggling with maintaining good friendships I was also being bullied for reasons some fake girls in my school had invented. But now that I'm in much more healthy, I can see the good again. Don't only look at the big things, but also the little things, like watching a snowflake melt on your fingertip or looking at the leaves falling off the trees. 

Through all of this, be your own best friend

Love yourself as much as you can, no one else will do it for you! There will be dark times in your life when there's no one to support you and you're going to have to heal yourself all on your own. Choosing a best friend does not only make you very clingy when with that person, it also gives you expectations that that person can never fullfil, leaving you nothing but disapointment. Don't be so hard of yourself, and when feeling horrible, comfort yourself. Because at the end of the day, when you keep spreading kindness, everything will be okay.

I hope you liked reading this post, I'm sorry if it's a bit all over the place, I've a lot to share with you on this subject. Enjoy you Christmas holidays!

xoxo Lien Bee

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